One of the best parts of your relationship is deciding how you’re going to spend time with your partner. Not only will those moments bring you together, but they also give you both something to look forward to.
We tend to underestimate the importance of quality time with our partners. If I’ve learned anything from relationship writing, it’s that many of us will hang out with our partners but glued to our phones or the tv—that’s not quality time.
Why does quality time matter?
Spending quality time with your partner helps nurture and grow the relationship. When you spend quality time together, you’re taking the necessary steps forward in establishing a connected and secure relationship.
If you want to connect on a deeper level and be vulnerable, then you’re going to need to invest time in having meaningful experiences and conversations.
Quality time isn’t about how much time you spend together; it’s how to choose to spend the time. That said, if you want to improve the quality of time with your partner, here are some helpful ideas.
Be present
We have a lot of things going on in our lives. And when you’re in a long-term relationship, it’s easy to let the small day-to-day tasks take priority over your relationship.
When you’re with your partner, make an effort to put your phone and any other device away. Spend time talking, bonding, laughing without any distractions. Spending quality time with your partner means being present next to them.
Have sex!
Want to spend quality time with each other? Well, why not get intimate? Being intimate in the bedroom has huge benefits in your relationship.
It makes you feel connected with your partner, thanks to the oxytocin hormone that’s released during sex. This hormone is responsible for creating a bond between partners.
Light some candles, put some music on and don’t forget the foreplay!
Share your day
We all have busy lives. And sometimes, we push our relationship to the side. But from my experience with relationship writing, this is the moment when you need to make an effort to pay more attention to each other.
Start by asking your partner about their day. Spend one hour (30 mins about you, 30 minutes about them), talking about the day. Share what happened, if there were any successes, any challenges. These conversations will help reconnect you two.
Go outside of your comfort zone
You have your day-to-day routine, but it’s time to step outside of it and try something out of your comfort zone. Really, it’s anything that gets your adrenaline pumping.
For example, my partner and I went hot air ballooning and rock-climbing—two things that definitely scare me. But we did it.
And there’s a good reason why I’m recommending this during counselling relationship. When your adrenaline rises next to your partner, you start to feel excitement and energy. You start to associate your partner with feelings of arousal and excitement.
Do something new together
While there’s no doubt you should spend time doing things on your own, you can also try out new things with your partner. For example, me and my partner have done a lot of new things together, like horseback riding, rock-climbing and hiking.
By trying new things together, you bond and connect.
Have a laugh
Whenever you can, look for ways to share a laugh together. Laughing and having a good time are ways you can create a positive bond in your relationship. Not to mention, it also relieves stress.
Put on a comedy, tell a joke—whatever makes you and your partner smile, do it.
If relationship writing and counselling relationship has taught me anything, it’s the importance of spending quality time with your partner. Use these tips to help you bond and connect with your partner.
